Mommy!

Here's a truth. I have been sleeping in my parent's bedroom since a couple of weeks ago because my room is messy. My bedroom is just impossible to sleep in at the moment because I'm in a "decluttering phase." I decided during one random afternoon that I would just clean some uneccesary HS junk in my room, probably rearrange the furnitures, and hang up some wall decor. That didn't happen in the weekend I intented to do most of this "decluttering."

So, off to my parents' bedroom I slept. It's just me and my mum by the way, since my dad's back at his work in California. And so every night, it gets super hot. And every night, it gets emotional all thanks to this one soft rock station where callers request songs for their loved ones. It's hard for me to block off music, OK? And considering that I can't manage to fully tune things in general out, I couldn't help but listen to the radio.

Last night, the most heartfelt dedication I heard was about this mother who had chosen to give her daughter up for adoption. That loss was pretty much new and raw given that it's only been nine months. It irritated me a little because the radio host had asked her if the decision still breaks her heart up until now. Hello?! Insensitive much? The woman said that it does, whenever she thinks about it. And she went on to ask the radio host to choose the song for her because she doesn't know what particular song to dedicate for her nine-month-old daughter.

The song played. I don't know the title. I don't know the artist's name. But it was just so lyrical and deeply moving that I started crying. And I hate it when I cry because of a song/film/book/painting/picture because it takes too long for me to stop. I wouldn't be able to stop myself. So, I was there. My mum's already asleep. I was crying my eyes out. My nose was running. And I was afraid of making the slightest sound because I didn't want my mum to think I was crying for no reason.

But I actually was! The unknown song just made me realized how lucky my siblings and I are for having her as a parent. Like no joke. She sacrificed so much for us. And no matter how ungrateful children we seem to her, she doesn't give up on us. I really, really, love her!